aprils gone!?!? what the heck!

Posted by Teen Bean

so i can't believe that april is so gone. two weeks in amsterdam, one week at a kiroas, one week in ibiza... and finally back in england. i missed it soo much here it was scary! but it was amazing to come home to good friends and with new kindled passion for the mission we have here in england!


so a little update on ibiza. the island was just incredible. we got to spend a good amount of time walking the streets praying for the bars, pubs, clubs, workers, prostitutes, and business. It was so powerful to join the prayer team there that by the end of the week i was sad to leave because i wanted to stay and see how our prayers were answered!! We also got to spend a lot of time farming. The 24-7 team there in ibiza just started renting this gorgeous and hugmungo house and they are starting to farm it as well. we spent the better part of two days just digging into the ground, pulling weeds, and connecting our physical work of gardening to the spiritual work of gardening. it was incredible. plus every now and again i would just stop working (all freaking dirty and sweaty) and just look out at the most amazing view ever of two mountains, soft valleys, and an unbelievable sight of the ocean. it was breath taking. we also spent one night worshiping God in the club. which was so amazing and different from anything i had ever done before. it surprised me how easy it was to worship God there. the team did an amazing job preparing us for all that we had to do that week and in the end it really payed off!

we got home on saturday and were just completely knackered! but i refused to let any sort of physical weariness stop me. The 3 year out guys (john, james, and steve) all leave this week for their "overseas mission" part of their year. its been a weekend of extreme happy-sadness if i ever had one. i am so excited for them to be able to adventure out into the world with the mission of taking what they have learned about God and blessing the nations, but at the same time i selfishly am quite irritated that they would dare think of leaving me at such an emotionally vulnerable time! how rude! 

oh i'm also stressing because this week... in fact in like 2 hours i have to make a life decision about what i am doing next year. i have an interview with the school i was thinking about doing my masters degree at... and more than anything i want to go through with this interview... but it just seems sooo wrong. i can't put my finger on it! its times like this that i die for people like Laura and Sarah that i could just vent my entire life to! oh the need to vent! what can i say i process externally... its a curse not a gift!

so in between crying my eye out and laughing when i remember the good time... i also had an amazing day just getting back to the everyday life of transit! i got to serve at the boiler house today and i absolutely loved just tidying the house. no one else was there and I just blasted my music and went ah-lah-crazy on cleaning the house... it felt way good! then i went over and help this lady named lisa plan out a prayer room that we are going to help this church in this little english town (suffux or something like that) set up... i am so excited because setting up prayer rooms is actually one of my favorite things of this year out! the theme is "Alive to God" so should be fairly solid i say!

ok well i will write later... maybe when not in such an emotional state and then maybe my blog will come out a little less scattered and a lot more focused! sorry my bad! 

KISSES and rockstar wave!

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Kiaros!

Posted by Teen Bean

so I just spent a week in london (sunburry court) learning all that it takes to be involved in mission. A big part of my year out is learning about the importance of cross cultural missions. so we spent a week learning about culture shock, and mission movements, and watching movies about missionaries going to these tribes and telling them for the first time about jesus and who he was... some really incredible stuff.


half way through the week i was really starting to stress because i was thinking again to myself how much i really do not feel a call to be what they called a "front line missionary". they kept pushing how important and special it is to be one of these people that goes and reached "unreached people groups".  i was thinking yeah i feel the intense desire these people have for serving God and i want to do the same, but i really don't feel like i am called to that life style. So, i started asking myself "how am i going to live out this call to be passionate for God, if i'm not called to do it in the same way that these people are?" for a moment i thought, "its either front line missions or nothing?" but lucky God didn't let me get to caught up in that...

God really reminded me how he considers the whole picture and how he does have a special call on my life and i just need to take a breath and breath and just live everyday as fully i i can for him and he will take care of the rest! so that being said, the rest of the week i had some really good experiences learning about how important intercessory prayer is for unreached people, we played a game learning what it takes to go to a completely different culture that make me seriously laugh out loud, we even roll played/ dressed up like muslims and did this prayer activity that really help me to identify with the muslim culture.

walking away from this week i really realized more the responsibilities we have as christians to the people around us. I really want to look more into the idea of mentoring, church leadership, and being a mission mobilizer! I also am excited to live life with more intercessory prayer for these unreached people! i know prayer makes all the difference and lives are transformed by our prayers! This week really taught me that even tho i might not be able to get on a plane and fly to africa... i can get on my kneels and pray for them and join God in the most powerful way... with my prayers! I am so excited to learn about different unreached people and then join other christians in praying that God will bless their lives just like he has so fully blessed my life! 

well, i need to get to bed... we had one busy week and tomorrow we are packing and on sunday we leave for a prayer pilgrimage to the spanish island of ibiza! i am really excited to go join the 24-7 Prayer community there and help them prepare for their high season. The team there in ibiza, ministers to loads of visitors and locals that come for the pubs, clubs, and bars. They believe in spending the week before their high season just prayerfully preparing their ministry for all the work they are going to do. so we get to go and help them pray into this plan God has for their ministry this summer! i am so excited.... should be amazing! much love

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leaving for amsterdam in like 10 min!

Posted by Teen Bean

so i am dying to be in amsterdam already. my flight doesn't leave until 1540 and i have been ready to go sense 10am! so i am here blogging trying to distract myself so that i don't annoy Carla who is giving me a ride to the airport!


this trip just came together so easily. two weeks ago i was thinking i prolly wont even go and now here i am plane ticket in hand and bags packed ready for a new adventure. I really have no idea what to expect seeing as how i never really have stayed in a hostel before. but every time i read about them or hear about them i always think they are such fabulous ideas! i think getting away from the normal rhythm of my life here will also help me to appreciate the life i have here in england as well.

This hostel, Shelter City, also sounds incredible. The majority of the staff are volunteers that all live in a shared dorm. They get together every morning for prayer and bible study, then spend about 4 hours doing work in the hostel, the have the late afternoon free to join in some of the events the hostel puts on. I think they are living out a call for Christ in a way i find completely attractive, in that they are just serving people in a very natural and needed way (given them a bed to sleep in and a roof over their head), but at the same time leaving enough space to build relationships with people, to encourage prayer, and to share the gospel to those that are interested. It just seems very natural and organic to me! which might sound kinda hippy, but i like that kind of christ centered living!

I am so ready to just get there and soak it up for all its worth. i really have a feeling this is going to open more doors then even i was ready for! which is exciting. The last time i was at TCF church i had a guy pray for me and he told me that i am striving after God and praying that i want to see and live the things i am reading about in the Bible. And he said that i need to be ready because the life i keep desperately fighting for is just going to come, very unexpectedly and very easily! i can't help but notice the similarities between my trip to Amsterdam and that prayer! even if just going to amsterdam solidifies my desire to be somewhere else or just gets me to think in a different way... i know this journey is going to change me!

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Amsterdam!

Posted by Teen Bean

so i just found out that i am off to Amsterdam! I have a two week break coming up... well we actually broke up on friday so i currently am on easter break! wooopie! I really wanted to just be involved with a different ministry and see what heart and passion there goes into that kind of service. I leave on monday so i will be there for two whole weeks. I can't wait to see what holland is all about! and Dutch people! 


so last night i went clubbing in this town called Basildon... they affectionately call it Bas Vagus! it was absolutely hilarious. this club had two levels and the top one was a proper heavy beat club... (we didn't stay up there to long), the bottom floor was sooooo funny. The DJ had to be the worst DJ known to man. I think it was clinched when he played "i'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world" it was hilarious. I seriously stop and thought everyone would boo him out of the box, but ohhh no! everyone just screamed and started singing and dancing! ha ha oh the english! 

Today i spent the better part of the day collecting video footage for this film a guy and i are working on about Community. I actually really really enjoyed asking people questions and setting up the camera! it was a ton of work tho, and i have a whole new appreciation for what film editors/producers have to go through... lots of work!! I just love taking pictures and movies its like my most favorite hobby! 

Oh and the other day i went to the mall and bought the most amazing ganstahhh hat ever. Let me say that right now i have this completely overwhelming obsession with hats... i want to buy every hat i see!! ha ha! But i controlled myself and just bought this freaking awesome black hat with gold stars! it is beautiful and i pretty much have worn it every day sense! Its like the old cowboy boots i got for Christmas and refused to take off! what can i say i get attached quickly to things! 

we are having people over tonight to play cards so i have to get going... but let me just say we introduced them to nertz and they absolutely love it! so it will be a late night of playing card!! woopie! love and peace! Oh and it feels amazing have Obama in england... my soul feels good!

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God is awesome!

Posted by Teen Bean

so tonight was amazing! i am just in my room, normal as all, when i hear a call for me to come down to the front door. i go down to the front door to find one of the girls from the town (she is like 14) just weeping out our front door. i stand there as she is crying and telling me how her boyfriend doesn't want to be with her and she loves him and how she doesn't want to be here anymore. 

 so, i feel so awful for her, but what can I do. so i'm just standing there hugging her, feeling completely unprepared to deal with this situation... and then am like God you just have to take control of this. We get her calmed down and she comes in and asks for some water. Her friends had gotten her all loaded on a bottle of wine (she is a tiny girl!). so she walks into our living room and we sit there and have a really good conversation about God and who he is and how he loves her. She tells us how glad she is that we are there because no one listen to her and she just really loves this boy. She also tells us how she is wanting to love this boy. I start to tell her how God loves her so much and how he loves her more than she even loves this boy. she looks me dead in the eye and says "i think i want to go out with God... do you go out with God? i want to go out with God" i was like "yeah all you have to do is tell him what you are feeling and ask him out" she is like " i want to go out with God"

so i ask her if i can pray for her and what she wants to pray about. she says she wants to pray that she gets over lee and that they can talk and for us to be successful because we are nice people. we spend sometime praying for her and asking for healing and for God to just really show up in her life... then this girl prays for us! it was sooo amazing and wonderful and satisfying! God is so awesome!! 

then this girl promptly asks to go outside so she can be sick and I got the honor of holding back this girls hair while she was sick out our front door! it was an awesome night! then we walked this girl home and chatted with her parents briefly and headed home! we spent some more time praying for her when we got home and now i am just sooo excited! God things are going to start happening in this girls life and i am sooo excited!! 

good times!

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Bar N Bus

Posted by Teen Bean

So every thursday night, sense i have been here, i go and help out at this youth outreach called Bar N Bus. In the beginning it really wasn't my bag of chips, because i really didn't feel called to work with any sort of youth at all. I mean youth are cool and all, but sometimes they can be so over dramatic (hee hee yeah i know i pretty much described myself!) 

Anyways but the more i went to this Bar N Bus the more i fell in love with the kids and really have just started getting this huge heart for loving on them. So many of these kids just come from really hard home lives. Most of them are 14 years old and they are smoking everything from fags to pot to cocaine, getting drunk on the weekend is the norm, and violence is a common form of entertainment. we are really into the whole relationship building side of showing Christ love and most the time it is really hard. I find myself constantly wanting to just shake God into them. They are all so bored of the normal Godless lives they are living, but at the same time they still haven't started seeking after God either. so there is this intense battle that goes on every thursday night!
the last couple of thursdays have been sooo hard. every thursday we have had to close down early due to the kids starting fights. it is soo hard to leave them or make them leave when that all starts because i feel that those are the times that we really should be engaging with them, getting to know what they are dealing with, and being willing to listen to them. 
so this thursday when i went to the bus there was a rumor that some girl was coming from this other town and was going to knife one of the girls that had been in a fight last week. So the police were out and we were all warned to stay near the bus. It actually was one of the best nights we have had in a while. We were able to have some really good conversations with the kids. i've also learned that i am a task person. i got to work behind the bar at the bus and i just love that. I think its because in my mind i need to have a job that i can start and finish... a defined purpose... and being behind the bar i get that. its also too, why i struggle so much with the building relationships with the kids because you don't meet someone, build trust, get them to open up, and help them learn how to transform their lives for christ all in one night! Its a process! but even being behind this bar, with this defined sense of purpose i learned how important it is to step away from that and build into the relationship side as well. the kids were all happy to chat and help and laugh with me while i was at the bar because of all the times i stood out in the freezing cold, or rain, or snow and chatted with them. ahhh how it all works together!
so tonight a couple girls here (twins to be exact) are having a big ol' happy 21st birthday party... so i am very stoked to get to go and chill out at that. my spring break starts in a week and there is the possibility that i might be traveling to amsterdam over that time to visit a christian mission hostel that is set up there in the red light district. i actually am really looking forward to that... if it happens and if it doesn't, then thats ok too. I'm learning that life is full of door and options to live and we are allowed and even encouraged to try and push open as many doors as possible, but that we need to trust God to allow the doors we are pushing on to open or stay closed. I have been disappointed a few times when i pushed really hard on a few doors and got nothing only to slightly lean against another and have it fly wide open. God does things so much different then i would!!! ha ha
so i will fill you in on weather amsterdam happens or not. well i broke my bed the other day when one of my room mates and i jumped on it too hard, so i had to find a new bed and today i think is the day that i shall do the great swap! ahh how nice is it going to feel to sleep in a fixed and comfy bed?? very well i think! so i should get cracking! love to you all... PEACE!

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summer in march!

Posted by Teen Bean

so the weather here has just been amazing this weeks. lots of sun lots of sun lots of sun! sense i am in England i pretty much have learned that on days where there is sun all must be abandoned in an effort to capture this rare commodity. 


so today being my study day i actually am having a really hard time convincing myself that i should spend any amount of this day doing anything related to work! but i am sure i will buckle down in a moment and realize the importance of a study day!

i had a really fabulous weekend, hanging out with my friends and just having a laugh. we've started prayer walking the town on Friday nights and we have set up a prayer space in our garage. so far it has gone very well. loads of the kids from town have stopped by asking questions about what does it mean to pray, letting us pray for them, and asking hard questions about what the bibles is about and why it is important. I love the those nights because the kids are just in their element, so i think they feel way more comfortable to ask questions and explore. we also are challenging ourselves to be more intentional and really do what we keep saying we are doing (pray!). it is hard because i don't always naturally think "can i pray for you?" but i do pray for most of these kids during the week and the power of prayer is amazing!

i also am in love with this week because it is three of my friends birthdays here we we have party stuff planned for like the whole week. Last night we went to the pub for two of the girls birthdays and just has such a laugh. there was about 12 of us and we just over took this part of the pub and were laughing and singing and telling jokes and stories... it was beautiful! ha ha it also was st Patrick's day so there was another group of girls in the pub, i think celebrating that, and they were hilarious! they were drinking way to much and kept getting up and doing these dances... a few from our group kept teasing to do play rock, paper, scissors and the looser would have to join these girls... but right in the moment of having to actually play we would chicken out because the cost of playing would be quite high! it was really fun!

well i best be off! love and peace!
tina

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